Property of Mistress Carrie

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Link to The HTML Writers Guild

This part of my homepage acts as the "About Me" section on most people's homepages. Without a section like this, how could it truthfully be called a homepage?

NOTE: This information is NOT to act as a resume of any sort. This section is not supposed to be taken completely seriously. It's meant to have some elements of humour in it, whether it be obvious or dull. For a résumé, please see the Online Résume section.

Christopher Parker -- October, XXXV A.S. -- Age 17

Full Name: Christopher Charles Parker

Date of Birth: September 21, XVII A.S. (1983 C.E.)

Height: 6'5"

Weight: Fluxuating. (~270 lbs.)

Gender: Male (At least, I was last time I checked.)

Occupation: Freelance Programmer/Web Developer, First Church of Satan Magistrate

Hobbies: Computer Programming, Music (listening, playing, and singing), Sleeping, Sex, Hanging w/ Friends, Helping People

Marital Status: ---

Favourite Cheese: Orange American (Individually-wrapped Processed Cheese Food Product Slices)

Peircings: None.

Tattoos: None yet. Future plans -- an eye in my left palm.

Sexual Orientation: Straight

Religion: Satanic Scientific Pantheist <- Click!

Musical Interests: Black/Death/Epic/Speed/Thrash Metal, Electronica, Classical

Favourite Quote(s): "Roses are red, Violets are blue, You drive trucks, I like peanut butter.", "Remember Tim Toady", "What?", "The death of one is a tragedy, but the death of a million is just a statistic."

Christopher Parker -- April, XXXIII A.S. -- Age 15

I see myself as being a rather easy-to-get-along-with type of person. I treat others as I expect them to treat me; I try to give everyone a fair chance at first. I've never actually been in a fist-fight with anyone, so that just goes to show my nature.

"Do unto others as they do unto you"; because if you "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," and they, in turn, treat you badly, it goes against human nature to continue to treat them with consideration. You should do unto others as you would have them do unto you, but if your courtesy is not returned, they should be treated with the wrath they deserve.

Fun Stuff

My DJ Name: DJ Crisp&fresh (

My Exact Worth: $2,379,210.00 (

I took a "Personality Disorder Test" on the 'net @ Here were my results. You can click on the disorder names to see 4degreez's definitions of each disorder. Why not take the test yourself and see what it says for you? Click on the link at the bottom to do so.

NOTE: If you do take this test, remember that just because your behaviorisms may coincide with those of people who are labeled "disordered", does not mean that you are "disordered". Just like all of the psycho... *ahem* ...psychic ads you see on the TV, this test should be used for entertainment purposes only.

Disorder Rating
Paranoid: Moderate
Schizoid: Very High
Schizotypal: High
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: Moderate
Narcissistic: High
Avoidant: Low
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: High

-- Click Here To Take The Test --

CCP -- Christopher Charles Parker